Mommy Blog Lines: Tal(k)ing Care

Heya FFF and GG: Close to xmas! I am ruminating on threads of our last face-to-face conversation. Witnessing–listening to difficult subjects or staying present in uncomfortable social circumstances–can be a way of learning and of doing the right thing. This is a timely thing to contemplate (and enact)– facing the holidays and likely many opportunities to listen to people unfold parts of their lives that might be easier not to know. My inclination, despite being a curious person, has always to turn away, and this motivated by a sense of behaving with courtesy or manners –not to listen to or read intimate details, as if to do so is in bad taste. I really like rethinking this–to understand listening and patience as an important duty and as a way to learn. Another question that interests me has to do with editing the blog site–monitoring or regulating who can comment (even who can read?) the blogs. I can understand the need to safeguard a site, especially if it is one that discloses d...

FFF here. I am thinking about SS's last posting where she engages with "an interesting article about the ethics of reading a zine, in which girls disclose personal matters" and questiones whether the reader should “stay out or wade in?” as well as which "readers are welcome, and who is intrusive?" Her questions are similar to the considerations in the December 20th bluemilk blog posting entitled, "why your comment got deleted" ( http://bluemilk.wordpress.com/2011/12/20/why-your-comment-got-deleted/ ), where the author explains why deleting certain comments on a blog are vital to creating safe and productive spaces for discussion. She recalls a particular case of only allowing the voices and opinions of people with disabilities to appear on a blog, rather than those of care givers, family members, and professionals. It seems to me that making space and places for young folks to express themselves is part of the ethics of happiness that SUS also raise...

Well, I found my way in to post – maybe a metaphor here for finding the path! (It had to do with solving a techno glitch, which takes away a bit from the metaphoric punch!) I just read an interesting article about the ethics of reading a zine, in which girls disclose personal maters–should the reader stay out or wade in? what readers are welcome, and who is intrusive? Isn’t reading/watching another form of exploitation (or, viewed more optimistically, in a reader-friendly way, the reader could claim to be paying attention)? These questions percolate ethics. Another fascinating strand involves thinking about about Aristotle’s equation of happiness and goodness. Have I got that right, is it Aristotle? Anyhow, if we work with this, it connects to many bloggers’ sense of entitlement when it comes to talking about family life in an open way–writing makes them happy, and as a happier person they function as a better mother and family figure. An ethics of happiness, rather than one based...

Today I find myself pondering the comments posted by SS and GG in response to my previous posting within the context of last week’s National Day of Remembrance and Action on Violence Against Women in Canada , which is held annually on December 6th to mark the anniversary of the 1989 murder of 14 twenty-something year-old women by twenty-four year old Marc Lepine, who systematically separated the women from the men and shot them because he believed the women studying and working at l’École Polytechnique in Montréal were feminists and were responsible for his failure. I am struck by the connections among the comments and queries offered by SS on Dec 2nd about the fluidity that is often required/involved in mothering children, particularly when children move into themselves in ways that their parents had not anticipated and/or desired, GG’s comments on the same afternoon addressing the trouble and discomfort some folks have toward Lady Gaga’s strategic disruptive gender performances th...

Hi! Freaky for Feminism (FFF) here. I must admit that I’m feeling a little shy and unsure of what to say in this first post ~ other than to declare that I’m excited about the possibility of many rich discussions around gender fluidity, the ethics of posting about children who are not adults, and issues around informed consent. I am keen, too, to talk about language associated with gender expression, and I like the term gender fluid/fluidity, which in my mind, encapsulates and honours the diverse ways in which gender is experienced, expressed and lived in people’s lives. To be honest, I believe that all of us play with our gender ~ we practice and perform our gender constantly, sometimes consciously and others not so much. I’m most aware of it when I put any clothes on. What activity am I about to engage in? Work, play, relaxing, shopping? Is this a public appearance I am dressing for? Who will see me? What will they expect from me? What do I expect from myself? What do I expect fro...